


Bitterly Poisonous. Saccharine Sweet

by WallyX



Series: ATEEZ Vampire AU [2]
Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, Angst with a Happy Ending, First Times, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Marking, Masturbation, Misunderstandings, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-31
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:27:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22047124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WallyX/pseuds/WallyX
Summary: Yeosang, to say the least, is a simple person.He lets Seonghwa kiss him without complaint, let’s the older touch him with delicate hands and gentle lips, grins like a love sick fool when sweet nothings are whispered against his skin during the witching hour. He is content with what he has and the way he lives, could not ask for more when Seonghwa is smiling so brilliantly at him.Yeosang, however, is not as patient as he would like to be.------------Or, Yeosang is in love and wants to move his relationship forward. Seonghwa continues to avoid him.
Relationships: Kang Yeosang/Park Seonghwa
Series: ATEEZ Vampire AU [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1525604
Comments: 8
Kudos: 189





	Bitterly Poisonous. Saccharine Sweet

**Author's Note:**

> HELLO EVERYONE,,, Thank you so much for the support on the first part of this fic! It means so much to me. I wanted to get this out before 2020 hit, and I would have gotten it out sooner if it weren't for college! However, this is just.... 10.8k+ words of Seongsang trying their best to get their groove on. I hope you enjoy!  
> Not really beta'd, so I apologize if there are any inconsistencies or errors! (I may go back and fix it some more if anything is too awful)

Yeosang, to say the least, is a simple person.

He lets Seonghwa kiss him without complaint, let’s the older touch him with delicate hands and gentle lips, grins like a love sick fool when sweet nothings are whispered against his skin during the witching hour. He is content with what he has and the way he lives, could not ask for more when Seonghwa is smiling so brilliantly at him.

Yeosang, however, is not as patient as he would like to be.

He anticipates when Seonghwa's hands linger on his skin for longer than they need to, his skin burns when kisses leave a fiery wake, and he absolutely  _ melts _ when Seonghwa manages to touch him  _ just  _ right; but that's all there is: calculated touches and smouldering kisses that end before anything can begin, the older always smiling prettily (albeit painfully) when he pulls away, clearly wanting to do more but refusing to do so.

So, in all, Yeosang's patience is waning thin.

They expressed their feelings a  _ while _ ago (two and a half months, to be exact, but who was counting?) and things were great, fantastic even; nothing had changed between them and Seonghwa doted on him to his full potential while Yeosang pretended it didn't make his head swim. Despite this, despite the love that oozes from Yeosang's pores at just the mention of Seonghwa, Yeosang wanted more. He wanted the kisses to lead to more, the touches to make him gasp, the experience to simply be  _ more. _

“Are you alright, Starlight?” The question startles the younger out his thoughts, amber eyes focusing on the weight on Seonghwa’s hand against his thigh and the worry in his tone instead of the thoughts that plague him. 

“I’m fine, Hwa; don’t worry about it.” Yeosang accentuates his statement with a brief kiss to Seonghwa’s lips, hoping the older doesn’t learn of his impure thoughts.

Pressing his lips back towards the younger, Seonghwa smiles into the kiss, breathless peals of laughter spilling from his lips.

“Okay, I believe you.” Seonghwa’s lips are sweet as they brush against the brunettes. “Come on, let me make you something sweet, okay?”

Yeosang can feel his heart swell with something more than love; it doesn’t feel good.

Seonghwa is holding his hand with pretty fingers and smiling at him with the passion of a thousand suns and all Yeosang can think of, to his misfortune, is how pretty Seonghwa would look sucking him off.

_ That’s what it is. _ Yeosang realizes, skin flushing.  _ Guilt. _

xxxxx 

The curtains are drawn in Seonghwa’s room (that, at some point, also became Yeosang’s room), light barely slipping through the cracks and resting against the floor in a glittering puddle; but Yeosang isn’t focused on it. Instead, he focuses on Seonghwa’s lips pressed firmly against his as the older kisses him  _ slow _ , hands mapping out the expanse of unmarred skin with dragging touches that leave fire in their wake. 

The brunette shifts, has Seonghwa press his weight against him onto the mattress, feels heat boil in his blood when the raven hums appreciatively and licks against his lips for access. 

“You’re always so sweet, Starlight,” comes the breathless praise as cold fingers dig absently against the indent of Yeosang’s ribs, effectively causing the younger to hum his apparent praise. 

“Am I really, Hwa?” he grins, cheekily coquettish as he bites Seonghwa’s lower lip. “Or are you just saying that because I just drank blood and you want to taste some for yourself?”

There is a beat of silence before Seonghwa is laughing against Yeosang’s lips, fangs grazing the sensitive skin.

“Where do you come up with these things?” he presses another firm kiss to Yeosang’s lips, causing the younger to get more excited than he wanted to. “Of course I don’t want a taste, my moon,” their lips are barely apart when he speaks again, as if he’d rather keep kissing Yeosang than continue the conversation. “Why would I want to taste blood when all I want to taste is you?”

It is embarrassing how quick the words get to Yeosang, sleep pants suddenly too tight and hands clamming up.

“Oh.” is all that slips from the brunettes lips, amber eyes glittering in the shade of the room.  _ Really, Yeosang?  _ He berates himself quietly, face flushed with embarrassment. 

As if a switch was flipped, Seonghwa is blushing, pulling away from the younger with cheeks that burn a dull ash rose.

“I apologize, that was a bit forward of me.” silver eyes avoid amber as he clears his throat awkwardly and Yeosang wants to scream that  _ no, it’s okay, please keep talking like that, it’s so hot, _ but instead his mouth is clamped shut while he stares at the man above him. “Forgive me if I overstepped your boundaries, Starlight.” 

God, does Yeosang want to scream.

“I-It’s fine,” are the words that slip past his lips. “Don’t worry about it. I don’t mind.” The air is suddenly too cold and too thick with sexual tension as Yeosang simply watches Seonghwa, begging that the other would get the hint without him having to explicitly say how he feels. 

Seonghwa fails to meet his gaze.

“I, uh,” The raven absentmindedly plays with the brunettes fingers and Yeosang finds it unsettling how Seonghwa hesitates with his words. “I’m going to take a shower; do you want me to make you something afterwards?”

Yeosang knows, he  _ knows _ what Seonghwa means when he implies to shower, and his skin feels incredibly hot, sweat beading uncomfortably on his back at the thought of Seonghwa cumming in his hand hurriedly with his lip caught between his teeth, but something else twinges in his chest that he can’t put his finger on.

He realizes, then, that he had just been staring at Seonghwa with half lidded eyes and a partially open mouth instead of answering his question and he swallows, throat too dry.

“It’s okay, I’m not hungry.” He can’t look Seonghwa in the eye.

“Okay.” The raven looks at Yeosang for a moment, presses his lips against Yeosang’s one last time before he gets up, making way towards the bathroom.

Once he hears the door lock, Yeosang reaches into his pants with a begrudging sigh, decides to ignore the sharp feeling in his chest, instead opts to stroke himself quickly until he cums with a broken moan and the thought of Seonghwa doing the same.

xxxxx

Yeosang doesn’t know how he ends up here; doesn’t know how he ended up underneath the raven, lips pressed against the others as he ruts up to no avail.

“Seonghwa,” the words are rushed, breathless as they slide out of the brunettes lips while the raven touches him, fingers gripping soft thighs as they are gently pulled apart, exposing sensitive skin and the erection that hangs heavily between them. “Hwa, I — please touch me,” Yeosang isn’t above begging at this point — not when he has waited so long for this.

“My pretty little Starlight…” is the gentle response, tone not matching the situation. “You’re so pretty for me, always so beautiful.” Yeosang preens, absolutely feeding off of the praise as Seonghwa merely pets his thighs, rubbing circles into the junction where thigh meets crotch, painfully close to where Yeosang wants him to touch the most. 

“I’ll be whatever you want me to be, Hwa,” replies the brunette, eyes trying to focus on the older but everything is blurred in splotches of bokeh. “I want to be good for you.”

“You always are, Starlight.” lips kiss Yeosang in a heated exchange, tongues lapping hungrily over one another greedily as the raven finally reaches higher, wrapping a calloused hand over the brunettes leaking cock.

“ _ Seonghwa, _ ” gasps the younger, hips stuttering pathetically into the others grip. “I — oh  _ God _ ,” The resulting chuckle is almost complacent as Seonghwa kisses against Yeosang’s flushed skin, thumb pressing deliciously against the slit of his cock to collect the precum beading there and causing the brunette to whine bashfully.

“Does it feel good, love?” asks the raven, lips grazing the youngers cheek with the whispered words. “Are you going to cum for me?”

Yeosang nods, indulges in the somewhat rough slide over his cock that stimulates him just right. “Yes,” he further confirms, breath a ragged mess that puffs out of him. “Yeah, it’s good, please make me cum.” The raven only hums in response, pressing another kiss to the brunettes skin.

“My Starlight,” Yeosang is trembling, thighs tightening against Seonghwa’s sides and he can feel his orgasm reaching, building hot in his stomach as Seonghwa works him. “Always so perfect for me.”

Yeosang wakes with a deep breath, chest heaving as he sits up. He grimaces at the feeling of sweat caking his back and matting his hair to his forehead, the feeling both uncomfortably warm and sickeningly cold at the same time. 

“Starlight?” Asks the older, voice groggy as he turns over to look at the younger. “Are you alright? Did you have a nightmare?” The brunette opens his mouth to speak when he feels it, uncomfortably warm in his sleep pants and sliding onto his thigh, and he almost croaks.

“U-uh, no. Just a weird dream.” Is the response that falls from his mouth, lacking grace. 

Does he tell Seonghwa? Does he just get it out of the way and tell him what he had been dreaming of? Let Seonghwa know that the option is on the table, y’know,  _ whenever you’re ready? _

The raven furrows his brow worriedly, sits up to press a gentle kiss to Yeosang’s flushed skin. On any other day, Yeosang would revel in the sweet attention, but he almost cringes, skin live wire and oversensitive to the touch.

He thinks against it.

“Let me hold you?” Asks the older, lips brushing against the brunettes and causing him to hold his breath.

_ Relax. Don’t be weird. _

“I might take a shower,” answers the brunette in a rush, hopes to clean himself of the evidence before Seonghwa notices the very apparent wet patch in his sleep pants that are just barely covered by the blanket they share. “But when I come back?” 

The raven smiles, eyes still heavy with sleep as he kisses the younger again hotly, lingering as he hums out a drowsy  _ of course _ , letting the younger get up to fetch his items as he lies back down.

“If I fall back asleep, do wake me up, my moon.” Drawls out the older, who stretches like a cat. “I don’t want to fall short on my promise.”

Yeosang ends up scrubbing his skin until it turns red, guilt oozing from every pore as he gets rid of the evidence, ignoring the feeling that returns, heavy in his chest but different from guilt. What was it that bothered him so much? Seonghwa must know that he felt this way towards him, right? Shaking his head, he buries the thought deep down, brushes it off as  _ I never said anything or was explicit, so he probably doesn’t know, _ before turning off the water and crawling back into bed, hair freshly washed and face a bright red. Seonghwa, diligent as always, stays awake and wraps his arms around the younger immediately, kisses sweet nothings into his skin before nodding off, unaware of Yeosang’s weighted gaze and even heavier heart addled with guilt.

xxxxx

Yeosang really wishes he was turned when he was, like, fifty or something; fifty year olds weren’t this unnecessarily horny, pent up, and cowardly, right? 

Whatever the answer, the fact of the matter was that he was still twenty something and a virgin and painfully aroused by the slightest of touch and that is how he finds himself in this situation: one hand down his pants and the other over his mouth as he strokes his weeping cock quickly to the thought of a particular black haired male that just so happens to be dressing in the other room, unable to propose to said raven that  _ hey, would you maybe want to help me with this? _

It’s embarrassing.

It’s so painfully embarrassing because Yeosang is so aroused and all he did was  _ look _ at it. By mistake. By accident. While walking in without knocking. Because he’s an idiot.

Seriously, he didn’t even  _ know  _ Seonghwa was home, let alone fresh out the shower, but he was on autopilot, walking up to their room and suddenly -- Seonghwa.

More importantly: Seonghwa’s dick. 

In hindsight, Yeosang  _ really _ should have just reacted naturally, probably just say  _ oh, sorry _ or  _ excuse me _ , but instead he just stood there and made an unflattering sound and  _ stared,  _ y’know, like an idiot, and when Seonghwa noticed he flushed a pretty red and moved to cover himself,  _ apologizing _ instead, causing the brunette to flush even more because  _ oh my GOD, why can’t I speak, he shouldn’t have to apologize, I walked in on him! _ But his eyes were glued to where Seonghwa’s (pretty, thick) cock was hanging and he wanted to choke and just expire on the spot. 

“I apologize, my moon, I should have locked the door,” is what Seonghwa had said as he licked his lips nervously, which hadn’t helped Yeosang  _ at all.  _ They both stared at one another for a bit, before the brunette finally jolts, coming to his senses.

“I’m sorry!” Yeosang had nearly shouted, covering his eyes and rushing out of the bedroom, running to the bathroom and locking himself inside, yelling out a “Let me know when you’re done dressing!” 

That’s how he finds himself in his current predicament: door locked, room still tacky with humidity from Seonghwa’s shower, and his hand shoved down his pants as he strokes himself pitifully to the thought of Seonghwa’s cock.

He thinks of it, but more importantly, he thinks of Seonghwa, thinks of the raven spreading him open, fingering him before he slides in, and Yeosang’s hips stutter at the thought, a generous glob of precum dribbling from his cock while he chokes on the ravens name.

Seriously, he shouldn’t be this affected by this, and he should  _ definitely _ not be doing this, but the thought of Seonghwa fitting himself inside of Yeosang’s (undoubtedly) tight hole has the brunette biting back a pathetic moan.

He’s close, about to cum, but something is missing and he doesn’t know what. Is it the touch of an actual other human? Does he have to finger himself? Should he just go to Seonghwa, lie flat on the mattress, and cry about how much he wants to finally be fucked into submission, and let the other have his way with him? Whatever it is, Yeosang can’t put his finger on it and he sighs in frustration, thumbing the slit of his cock just to feel the stimulation tingling in his legs.

It doesn’t take long, however, because suddenly there is a knock on the door and had Yeosang nearly jumped out of his skin, grip tight on his leaking dick.

“Starlight?” 

Yeosang can feel his skin burn at the pet name and strokes hesitantly.

_ Oh. _

“Yeah, Seonghwa?” How he managed to keep a stable voice, he has no idea.

“I just wanted to let you know what I’m finished dressing.” Yeosang knows it’s pathetic but the sound of Seonghwa’s voice is  _ so good _ right now that he continues the conversation.

“O-oh, alright.” he coughs to cover his slip up, hand twisting over his cock and he can feel the pressure building, building, edging him. “Sorry for walking in on you.” Is all he can really get out, breathing a little harder.

“Are you sick, Starlight?” There is genuine concern in Seonghwa’s voice and it’s almost enough to make Yeosang feel guilty. Almost. 

“No, I’m okay. I’ll be in the room in a second. Just need to wash my face.” This is the last conversation he expected to have with Seonghwa while he gets off, but it’s what he goes with because he is  _ so close _ and he wants to chase his high. 

“Okay.” Seonghwa is quiet for a second, before he continues, “It seems to me that you've got your…  _ hands full. _ Be sure to, um, clean up, when you're done."

A jolt of electricity runs down Yeosang's spine, painting his skin a rusty shade of rose as heat kisses his skin almost unpleasantly, his stomach churning with anxiety.

Seonghwa knows.

_ Oh my God,  _ Seonghwa knows what he is doing.

Unsure of what possesses him in the moment, what tells him to just throw everything out the window and stomach his emotions, Yeosang leans against the sink, adjacent to the door as he blurts out faster than he can hold it back, "Want to come in and help me?"

It's quiet after that; it stretches and stretches until Yeosang thinks that maybe, just maybe, Seonghwa had already walked away before he asked, or maybe the raven didn't hear, and he was in the clear, but neither possibility sat well with him. 

It's only until then that Seonghwa speaks, voice strained through the door.

"Don't be ridiculous, Starlight." Is his answer.

Yeosang is suddenly very okay with standing in the sun.

"Oh." Is all Yeosang says, suddenly very aware of his surroundings, his softening length, and the way his eyes prick with something more than the cooling humidity in the room. "Okay. Never mind, then."

Yeosang hears Seonghwa walk away after that, knows he’s alone in the bathroom, orgasm forgotten and a new feeling settling into his chest; not as sharp as before, not as heavy as the other -- it simply burrows it's way in, gets comfortable and resides in his bones, claims residency as it drowns him in thick ink. 

He wants to scream and stand still _. _

Peel at his skin until there's nothing left.

He hates this feeling; hates feeling like a kid who doesn't get what they want, but it's more than that. Feels stupid for finally saying what he feels without catching on to the clues that maybe Seonghwa doesnt see him that way, that maybe this isn't that type of relationship, that maybe he was in over his head. 

The embarrassment, then, reaches him, unbridled as it floods his cheeks with horrid amounts color as he stands still, eyes focused and unwavering as heat fills him but in a bad way this time, nursing the venom in his chest and helping it grow. 

_ I'm so stupid. _

He doesn't know how long it is before he exits the bathroom, cool air hitting his damp skin as he walks past their room and through the living room, keeps walking until he finds a room (his old room, he realizes), and closes the door. Only then does he realize the neat folding of his previous blanket, resting prettily on the foot of the mattress (Yeosang doesn't know when it was there, or when Seonghwa fixed his bed, or left it the way it was, but seemed almost fitting. Yeosang doesn't think too hard about it.)

Without second thought he grabs it, notices how cold the fabric is, sees the light layer of dust that slides off when the brunette unfolds the fabric, shakes it out and lies underneath it. He tries not to focus on the lack of kisses against his skin, or the absence of a particular smile, or the loss of a particular scent.

Instead he sleeps, blanket curled tight enough to almost imitate the warmth of another. 

xxxxx 

Neither of them talk about it; whether Seonghwa does it to save Yeosang some dignity or because it wasn't that important, Yeosang doesn't know -- what he does know, however, is that he's tired. 

The only thing that was mentioned was Yeosang sleeping in another room; Seonghwa had found Yeosang the night after and asked hesitantly, “Is something amiss?” to which Yeosang responded, “Just missed my old room, is all.” and that was it on the matter. Yeosang had ended up going back to Seonghwa’s bed anyway, realizing that sleeping alone and torturing himself wasn’t worth it; he’d let himself be selfish just this once, let’s himself indulge in the constant.

Nothing changes, and he should be grateful for that. Aside from mentioning the room switch, Seonghwa had simply blushed and told Yeosang that it was normal (to masturbate), and that he should let Seonghwa know next time (so that he could retain his privacy), and that was that. No scrutinizing gaze or biting words; just Seonghwa being understanding and painfully,  _ painfully  _ oblivious to the fact that Yeosang was aroused by him specifically and not his imagination.

So Yeosang is, for lack of better words, tired. 

He loves Seonghwa; loves him more than himself and thanks whoever hung the stars in the night sky for the ravens existence -- (sometimes he is convinced that Seonghwa did it himself, made the beautiful things in life perfectly, but that was beside the point) -- but he is also impatient and insecure and the words Seonghwa said still bounce back and forth in his skull like a game of table tennis, ringing in his ears and making his hands feel numb.

_ Don’t be ridiculous. _

Amber eyes looks down in embarrassment.

He tries not to think about it, tries not to let it bother him while Seonghwa kisses him, lazy press of lips and burning touches that never seem to last enough while the older indulges in the brunette, kisses from his lips to his temple delicately while something makes noise in the background of their living room. He tries to focus on the kissing, but the noise is buzzing, harmonizes with the thoughts in his head that knock together repetitively in a cacophonous ring that distracts him, makes him unresponsive to Seonghwa's advances, allowing the raven do as he pleases as he loses track of what transpires and relinquishes too much thought to the voices in his head. 

Too much is being said at the same time and it's almost overwhelming for Yeosang, but one thing rings the loudest, bangs and reverberates loudly in his ears, and makes him feel heavy, like his feet were replaced with lead and he wants to pull away, suddenly too sensitive and irritable and for the first time since knowing Seonghwa, he doesn't want to be touched by him. His skin feels entirely too hot and yet not hot enough, as though he were going through withdrawal, and he feels disgusting, like he shouldn't be here. He wants to push the older off, wants to crawl out of his own skin because the longer he stands there the longer he believes it, believes the words and himself and he wants to choke.

"Starlight?" He hadn't noticed Seonghwa was watching him, brow furrowed in worry. "Are you alright?"

_ You don't love me anymore. _

Yeosang doesn't realize he had stopped breathing.

"Starlight?" 

"Hwa," there is a burning in the brunettes eyes, be it from tears or not blinking, he doesn't know. "I'm okay, just tired."

"We just woke up." There is a frown on the ravens face. Yeosang doesn't like it. "Yeosang are you sure you're okay? I'm worried." His hand finds the skin of Yeosang's cheek and Yeosang wants to lean away from his touch.

_ You're getting tired of me. _

"You don't have to worry about me." The best fake smile he can muster is plastered onto his face. Seonghwa clearly doesn't buy it. "I don't know. I just don't feel well lately." Not a complete lie. 

Half-truths, right?

Seonghwa doesn't talk for a moment, watching the brunettes face.

"Why can't you tell me the truth, Starlight?"

_ Because I'm scared you'll get mad. _

_ I'm scared you will think I'm gross. _

_ I'm scared you don't want me anymore. _

_ I'm scared I'm scared I'm scared. _

"I am telling you the truth."

_ I'm scared you'll leave me. _

Without prying further Seonghwa looks down, holds onto Yeosang's hand as he laces their fingers together. 

"You know that I love you, Starlight. Whenever you want to talk, I'm here, okay?" 

The burning in his eyes returns, realizes why when tears slide down his cheeks, dripping from his chin in small rivulets and surprising them both.

"Okay." Is all Yeosang says, but his voice is tight, fighting the frown that wants to sully his features as he sniffs pitifully. He can't really look at Seonghwa, too humiliated to face the older while he just stands there and cries over something so idiotic but he can't help it, let's the tears spill freely while he continues to hold Seonghwa's hand as he stand in between the tug-of-war of craving affection and feeling repulsed. 

"Yeosang," the brunette looks up for a moment, unfamiliar with the older saying his name, and the look on the others face is cold.

Not cold in the way someone without mercy would be, but simply cold, like when you receive news that renders you speechless, heart vacant as you try to process your feelings.

Seonghwa looks heart broken.

"I'm sorry," he can hear himself, words watery as he forces them out past the lump in his throat. "I'm sorry Seonghwa, I'm sorry I'm so stupid." It's like an oil spill; the words pouring out in an inky pool that only seemed to increase in size, and no matter how much he tried to scoop it up, push back the words and forget he ever said them, remnants of black ink remain, staining the space between them, his hands, his lips, suffocating him with their viscous liquid and leaving him raw, vulnerable. 

"Yeosang, my love, what are you talking about?" Seonghwa's features are cursed with a frown, pools of silver wet with unshed tears as he examines Yeosang’s face, traces his thumb idly over the birthmark under the brunettes eye. "Do you want to talk in our room? I can make you something to eat, if you'd like? I just want to know how to make you feel better." 

Yeosang nods but he doesn’t know what he is answering, just allows the raven to hold his hand tighter, to guide them into their room to sit him down as he is caressed, pulled into an embrace that has him at odds with himself once again.

“What’s wrong, my love?” Seonghwa asks after some time, still holding onto the younger. Yeosang doesn’t answer right away, simply stays in the loose embrace, inhales the barely there scent of Seonghwa before he answers as quietly as he can, as if speaking it any louder would make it true.

“I’m scared that you don’t love me any more.”

Yeosang isn’t sure Seonghwa heard him, silence stretching between the two of them for a moment too long, brimming the brunette with anxiety before Seonghwa is pulling away, their hands separating as he holds Yeosang’s face, makes the brunette look up at him. 

His expression is unreadable but Yeosang could tell he’s hurt by the statement.

“What makes you think that, my moon?” is his query, fingers gentle as they caress the brunette’s skin. “I’m sorry for whatever I did to make you feel that way.”

“It’s just,” words trail off as Yeosang moves his face away, watches as Seonghwa winces at the rejection of contact while Yeosang wipes his tears, sniffles as he gains the courage to say what bothered him, tries not to think too much about Seonghwa’s feelings. “I just… I feel used, kind of. Like you only see me as a friend you sometimes want to kiss or someone that is only desirable for specific things.”

The words sound mean coming out of his mouth, Yeosang  _ knows _ it, knows that that isn’t true, that Seonghwa had literally killed people for him without a second thought because  _ I don’t want to lose you, _ but Yeosang couldn’t help but feel that way.

“I feel like I am not desirable to you, or that you don’t like me  _ in that way. _ I know that sometimes you get all, um, y _ ou know,  _ when we kiss and stuff, but you always stop and take care of it somewhere else! And I don’t want to make you do something uncomfortable, like if you aren’t into sex, that’s fine! But I wish you told me, so I wouldn’t be so stupid as to think that maybe we could do something more, and then I hinted that I wanted you to,  _ you know,”  _ He can feel the obnoxious amount of heat coloring his cheeks but Yeosang doesn’t care as he allows the words to tumble out while he gesticulates obscenely with his hand, noticing the way Seonghwa's cheeks redden in embarrassment. 

"I wanted you to help me and you told me to not be ridiculous and I guess it's stupid to feel bad over you saying that, but I'm like in love with you, and hearing you say that made me feel like the most unwanted person ever."

Neither speak for a moment, Seonghwa waiting for his cue to speak and Yeosang wondering if he should keep talking despite there not being anything else. Eventually the brunette yields, mutters out a tired “You can say something.”

“I’m sorry.” is the first thing Seonghwa says, reaching out to hold Yeosang’s hand but then remembering, brings his hands back to himself.

Yeosang suddenly feels awful.

_ Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. _

“I’m so happy you told me.” Seonghwa’s features are clearly melancholic despite the way he schools himself, Yeosang can tell that much. “I truly am sorry for making you feel that way, Starlight, the last thing I would ever want is to make you feel undesirable, or ugly, or unattractive, whatever word you think you are, you aren’t. I just…” 

For the first time in a long time, Seonghwa is at a loss for words, scratching at his cheek as he looks away from the younger shyly.

Yeosang thinks it’s endearing.

“It’s not that I don’t want to, um,  _ fornicate _ with you, Starlight.”

“Fornicate, Hwa, really? What is this, 1902?” responds the younger, but he’s laughing, which makes Seonghwa look at him with stars sparkling in his eyes.

“You hush now.” He nudges Yeosang’s leg gently, crooked smile forming on his lips when the brunette sticks his tongue out at him. “I do want to do more things with you, it’s not that I am against it or anything, and it’s no secret that I, you know…  _ think _ of you, when you aren’t around,  _ oh goodness,” _ Seonghwa covers his face in embarrassment, Yeosang laughs to hide the fact that the poison in his chest seems to ebb away, his body feeling warm with refound familiarity.

Talking to and with Seonghwa like this -- he hadn’t realized how much he missed this.

“So,” asks the brunette, holding onto the warmth in his chest before the poison settles in again and makes him cold. “Why haven’t you done anything?”

He holds his breath.

“I was scared I would mess up, or that maybe you weren’t interested -- at first.” The raven licks his lips nervously, fiddles with his hands a bit. “When you were in the bathroom and you had insinuated that I help you out, I thought it was just you wanting whoever to help you out, and not because you wanted to be with me in that way.”

Poison.

Yeosang prepares to pack up the warmth in his chest, packaging its belongings to bid it farewell when Seonghwa smiles, a pretty and genuine smile that has Yeosang flustered.

“That’s why I told you to not be ridiculous; not because I don’t want to be intimate with you in that way but because I didn’t want you to be silly and rush to do something that you would probably regret, but now I know.”

Yeosang hopes his cheeks aren’t as red as they feel.

“Know what?”

Seonghwa smiles a teasing smile, eyes half crescents when he purrs, “That you want to have sex with me.”

The resulting sound that leaves Yeosang’s mouth is anything but eloquent as he hides his face behind his hands, inky toxins being forced out his body, being erased from his chest as warmth floods every crevice inside of him, heart thudding quietly for a mere second while he laughs shyly into his hands and lies back onto the mattress.

“I mean, yeah, I do.” laughs the brunette, chest rising and falling as he looks at Seonghwa through lowered lashes. “You’ve been killing me for months now.”

“I’m sorry.” The raven pouts, leans forward towards the younger. “Is it okay if I touch you?”

“Of course.” The smile on Yeosang’s face is genuine when Seonghwa touches him, pale hands warm against porcelain skin.

“I’m sorry I made you feel that way, Starlight.” the words are whispered into Yeosang’s skin as the raven pulls him close, presses his front against the youngers back, enveloping him in a hug that has worry dripping out of Yeosang’s pores and replacing it with love. “I never want to make you feel like that again; I love you more than I can say, so all I can really do now is apologize.”

“It’s okay, I forgive you.” Yeosang turns around to face Seonghwa and all he wants to do is kiss him. “I know I was a bit difficult as well, since I didn’t tell you how I feel until I got overwhelmed. I should have told you instead of sleeping in my old room. I’m sorry too.”

“Nonsense.” Seonghwa’s hand finds Yeosang’s as he laces their fingers together and  _ man _ , does Yeosang want to kiss him. “You are never difficult.”

“That’s very sweet, but can I kiss you?” asks the brunette, smile bright on his lips when Seonghwa reddens up prettily and he doesn’t even need to hear the confirmation before their lips are pressed together sweetly as Yeosang moves to lie on top Seonghwa.

“You’re so bold tonight, Starlight, what’s gotten into you?” Seonghwa laughs, hands finding their way to Yeosang’s hips.

“You, hopefully.” is Yeosang’s bold response that has Seonghwa paling, floundering like he wasn’t just told moments ago that Yeosang very much does want to do this, and that Yeosang is probably a little too excited to get into ravens pants.

“Oh.” squeaks the older, blinking owlishly as Yeosang covers his mouth on a laugh.

“Was that too forward?”

“No, I like it.” Seonghwa leans up to leave a wet kiss against the others lips, quite literally taking Yeosang’s breath away.

This isn’t  _ exactly _ how he pictured tonight would go (kissing, crying, confessing, back to kissing,  _ sex? _ ), but he wasn’t going to be the one to stop it.

“I just -- as much as I want to,” Seonghwa takes a moment to drink in the sight of Yeosang in front of him and the brunette holds his breath in response, suddenly  _ very _ aware that Seonghwa is under him, looking at him like he wants to ravish him, and Yeosang reddens. “I don’t know about tonight, is that okay my love?” The brunette takes into account their position and the way the ravens lips brush against his and he nods dumbly because maybe if he waits longer it’ll be worth it.

“Can we make out tonight, then?” 

“Of course.”

Yeosang smiles into Seonghwa’s lips.

xxxxx

In hindsight, it really  _ was _ worth it. Yeosang didn’t mind waiting all that much anymore; not when the in between was just a build up for what was to come.

That’s how he finds himself in his current situation: lower lip caught between his teeth and bent over the kitchen counter as Seonghwa ruts against his ass like he’s desperate (maybe he is, and that just makes Yeosang even harder).

It started off normally: Yeosang leaning against the counter and talking to Seonghwa while the raven did something (was he cleaning? Yeosang can’t remember; not when there is delicious friction finally rubbing against his ass), and suddenly he was turned around as the other held onto him tightly, breath hot against the brunettes ear. The only thing separating Yeosang’s (willing) ass and Seonghwa’s (also willing) cock was the thin fabric of both of their sleep pants, both of them both fresh from waking up. 

“You’re so cute.” Yeosang hums deliriously at the praise, having been too focused on the cock slotting against his clothed ass cheeks to really listen. “You’re so small, Starlight, it really is so cute.” The brunette simply laughs and pushes back in return, earning an airy whine from the older.

“I bet I’d look even smaller when you see your big cock slide into my small ass, huh,” is his response and if Yeosang was being honest, he doesn’t know where the words came from either. They had the desired effect however, a rough moan escaping Seonghwa as he ruts just a bit harder, tightening his grip on Yeosang’s waist as he pulls him closer and eliciting a breathy sound from the brunette. 

“You have such a dirty mouth.” is all Seonghwa responds with, kissing against Yeosang’s nape hotly as he slows his pace down to a simple roll of his hips, slotting his length against Yeosang easily. The brunette doesn’t answer, simply moans quietly as he presses his front against the counter top when he hears the raven laugh. “What’s wrong, cat got your tongue?”

“No,” the smaller wiggles his ass teasingly. “Keep moving please, I’m so close.” He puts on his best  _ pity me _ voice, knows Seonghwa can see his face at this angle, soft reddened cheeks and all, and knows it works when he feels large hands reach under his nightshirt and touch him delicately, lips kissing his clothed shoulder.

Per Yeosang’s request, Seonghwa does pick up speed, ruts hard against the brunette’s ass as he kisses his nape messily, hands skirting uncharted skin with renewed vigor.

“I like it when you talk.” comes the sudden confession, peaking Yeosang’s interest. “Keep talking to me.” With Yeosang’s cock being rubbed against the counter with every thrust and Seonghwa’s hot cock rubbing against his ass, the brunette suddenly draws blank on what to say, brain melting into a puddle of goo.

“You feel amazing.” It’s cliche, but it’s something. “I can’t wait --  _ fuck--”  _ A particularly sharp thrust has Yeosang cursing through grit teeth. “I can’t wait until you’re finally in me and make me your bitch, Hwa.” A sound escapes Seonghwa and Yeosang isn’t sure if it was a growl or a moan (or both) but he rolls with it, biting his knuckle to keep from moaning too loud and to distract from the heat rising in his cheeks. 

“I’m going to cum, Starlight.” Yeosang simply nods. “Can I, um.” Seonghwa stills for a bit, suddenly shy and Yeosang peeks over his shoulder as if to ask  _ what’s wrong? _

“Can I cum on your…” Seonghwa gestures towards Yeosang’s backside and the brunette laughs.

“Yeah, sure.” Yeosang elects to ignore how breathless he sounds from just a bit of rutting as he slides his pants down just enough to reveal his bare ass, showing it off for Seonghwa. The raven touches immediately, squeezing the flesh in his hands playfully before Yeosang feels it.  _ “Oh.” _

The raven’s cock slides easily between his ass, thicker than Yeosang had anticipated and he shakes, nerves alight with excitement as he instinctively rolls his hips and causing the older to gasp. It doesn’t take much longer after that for Seonghwa to cum, sliding messily against the brunette beneath him as he holds him in place, using Yeosang’s body for his pleasure and further riling up the brunette.

“Come on, Hwa,” moans the brunette as he rolls his hips. “Let me feel your cum on my skin; mark me as yours.” That’s all it takes for Seonghwa to cum with a harsh roll of his hips and a choked off sound. Cum lands hot against the small of Yeosang’s back, his ass, and more importantly, his rim as Seonghwa continues to slide between him, tip messily grazing his hole and causing the brunette to squirm.

Seonghwa catches his breath, breathing heavily as he tucks himself back into his sleep pants, using his hand to run his fingers through the mess on Yeosang’s pearly skin, further marking the brunette.

Once sated, he turns Yeosang over, capturing the brunettes lips in a hot kiss that’s  _ slow _ , makes Yeosang melt into Seonghwa’s arms effortlessly.

“Can I get you off?”

Yeosang nods so fast he’s sure he has whiplash. 

A soft hand reaches into Yeosang’s pants and the brunette instantly knows he won’t last long, warns Seonghwa of it as he squirms pathetically against the ravens grip. 

Lips find one another in a messy exchange that is more tongue and teeth than anything but Yeosang loves it.

“Your cock is so cute, Starlight,” coos the raven against sweat slick skin. “Everything about you is so pretty.” He thumbs at the slit on Yeosang’s cock, effectively making the younger whine. “You’re doing so well for me, always so perfect.” Another wet kiss and Yeosang’s head is spinning. 

Seonghwa is pressed hotly against him, kisses his ear wetly when he moans, “I can’t wait for the day I get to choke on you--” and he can’t even finish the sentence before Yeosang is cumming hard into his hand, hands squeezing tight into the fabric of Seonghwa’s nightshirt as stars burst behind his eyelids. 

There is a moment of silence between the two; Yeosang catching his breath while Seonghwa cleans up to ignore the blush rising to his cheeks. When they finally settle, Yeosang tucked into his pants and Seonghwa’s hand cleaned, the brunette finally speaks.

“So you want to suck me off?”

“I wouldn’t be opposed.” Blushes the raven, silver eyes honest. “I know you’d taste sweet.”

Yeosang can feel his spent and overstimulated cock twitch pathetically and he curses his body for being so painfully responsive.

“You’re going to kill me, Hwa.” Laments the brunette playfully, reaching to grab for Seonghwa’s hand. “Now come on, let’s take a shower; your cum is drying on my ass and I owe you for giving me such an amazing handjob.”

Yeosang wishes he could photograph Seonghwa’s reaction: the blush that kissed his cheeks and the smile that made him shine brighter than the moon.

xxxxx 

It happens randomly.

That's how the best things in life happen, right? Randomly, with no coercion; you just roll with it. 

Which is why when it  _ does _ happen, Yeosang is  _ shy. _

It starts like this: Yeosang can't sleep.

The brunette stares blankly at the ceiling, amber eyes fixated on the barely there streak of light that bleeds through the thick curtain and counts backwards from one hundred.

_ 87, 86, 85. _

Seonghwa is fast asleep, back turned towards Yeosang as the brunette tries to match his breathing (to no avail). It hadn't been long since they decided to go to sleep, probably an hour or so ago is when Seonghwa finally kissed Yeosang goodnight (morning?) and dozed off, unaware of the brunette's racing mind and sleepless eyes. 

_ 84, 83, 82. _

He shouldn't wake up Seonghwa, right? Yeosang glances over to the raven, unsure of what to do. Pros of waking up Seonghwa: he has someone to talk to and maybe kiss and  _ c'mon _ , it's  _ Seonghwa _ . Cons of waking up Seonghwa: what if he wakes him up then Seonghwa can't go back to sleep? Or maybe he will get annoyed? 

Weighing the options has Yeosang more awake than ever, thoughts a jumbled mess as he bunches his shirt in his hands. 

A moment passes by before Yeosang flushes, embarrassed. He looks down at his sleep pants, then back up immediately, feeling heat stain his cheeks. 

_ You have got to be kidding me. _

He tries to count down faster.

_ 79, 78, 77, 76. _

He looks at Seonghwa again, wondering if masturbating is  _ really _ worth it at a time like this and if he should just ask Seonghwa to get him off, which makes him even more guilty. 

_ No _ . He shakes his head quickly, inhaling deeply before he continues.  _ I'll be fine. No need for that right now. _

He nods resolutely, closing his eyes and trying to ignore the idle heat that resides just under his pants. He doesn't  _ need _ to get off; his body is just playing tricks, right?

_ Unless? _

Yeosang whines pitifully as he weighs the new set of options. Pros: get off, feel good, Seonghwa, sleep. Cons: get off, feel  _ bad _ , guilt, anxiety. 

The heat between his legs and the sleeping body next to him makes his mind up for him it seems as he reaches over tentatively, lightly nudging Seonghwa.

"Hwa," he whispers, almost a bit too quietly. "Hey, Hwa, wake up." The brunette almost resigns and gives up, pretends it never happened before the raven stirs, hand reaching out to find Yeosang's and tangle their fingers together.

"Hm? Starlight? What is the matter?" He hasn't turned yet, eyes still closed with the tugs of sleep.

Yeosang feels horrible.

"O-oh. Um, it's nothing, nothing is wrong, just…" Yeosang trails off, unsure of how to answer.  _ It's just that I'm horny all the time? Or maybe that I want you to break my back? _

Yeosang takes a deep breath. What was he up to again? He begins at fifty, anyway.

_ 50, 49, 48. _

Seonghwa stirs a bit more, turns his head to face Yeosang with sleepy eyes and still-kiss-swollen lips and Yeosang can feel his endorphins rush.

_ 47 46 45. _

"What is it, my love? You know you can tell me." His eyes glitter even in the low light and Yeosang feels bashful again, like when they first kissed, nerves and the need to hide suddenly prevalent.

"I just… can't sleep and I, well, was wondering if you could help? Me, that is." With the way he is blushing, Yeosang is surprised he isn't glowing red in the darkness of the room, a small beacon of humiliation.

_ 41 40 39. _

Seonghwa is quiet for a moment, simply stares at Yeosang until he laughs airily, squeezing the brunettes hand in his soothingly. 

"Yeah, of course." Finally turning around he smiles as he presses a kiss to Yeosang's heated cheeks. "You're so cute, Starlight."

"You flatter me," is what Yeosang starts with, but the rest of his sentence dies in his throat when Seonghwa kisses him hotly, lips pressed together is a heated exchange before the raven asks for more, slick tongue running against Yeosang's lower lip. Obliging, Yeosang moans quietly as he let's Seonghwa kiss him, cock straining pathetically in his sleep pants as he ruts upward for some sort of friction. 

Noticing the action Seonghwa stops, lips still pressed against Yeosang as he talks against them.

"So hard already, Starlight? Did you get hard while I was asleep?" Teasing hands slide lower, lower, and Yeosang tries his best to remain calm.

_ What number was I on? 20? Does this even work? _

"What were you thinking of, my moon? Were you touching yourself?" A wet kiss is pressed against clammy skin. "Were you thinking of me?" 

"I was." Yeosang admits quietly, squirming under Seonghwa's gentle touches that sent heat everywhere. "I always think about you." He can feel Seonghwa smile from where his lips are pressed against the column of his neck as his hands trail lower, resting playfully at the seam of Yeosang's pants. 

"Oh yeah? What did you think of, Starlight?" He's watching him now, Yeosang knows this, and doesn't want to look him in the eye, electing to stay quiet. "Use your words, my love. I won't give you what you want unless you ask." Another kiss to Yeosang's lips and the brunette is stuttering.

"I-I,  _ fuck _ ," he knows he shouldn't be this turned on from just some kissing but Seonghwa is talking so prettily to him and his eyes are sparkling and his lips are swollen red and he will do whatever Yeosang asks and  _ maybe  _ the thought of it all just makes Yeosang a little more turned on that he should be. "I want you to fuck me, Hwa."

"Ooh." It's only one word but the tone is teasing as the raven draws it out, lips curling into a toothy grin that bares his fangs and Yeosang can feel his cock twitch at the thought of being bitten by them. "My precious little Starlight wants me to have sex with him, huh?" With trembling thighs, Yeosang nods. He  _ knows _ it's not going to go  _ exactly  _ how he wants; knows Seonghwa is probably going to rut on him, or give him a handjob (and that's okay!), but the simple thought of  _ hey, maybe we will fuck for real  _ has Yeosang trembling with even more excitement. 

"Does my little star even know what he's asking for?" Seonghwa muses, tugging down the waistband of Yeosang's pants to free his weeping cock, causing the brunette to hiss at the sudden rush of cold air. 

"I do, I really do." Is Yeosang's response, hands finding purchase against Seonghwa's shoulders as he ruts his hips up once again. "I want you to make me feel good." 

"Ah," It seems Seonghwa pities him, wrapping a hand loosely around Yeosang's weeping length as he presses a slow kiss against the brunettes lips. "Don't I always make you feel good, my moon? Do you want something more?" He accentuates his question with a particularly tight tug that causes Yeosang to whine pathetically. 

“Seonghwa, please,” Yeosang squirms uncomfortably in the ravens grip, trying to both escape and get closer to the sensation.

"Please what?" Seonghwa has a teasing grin on his lips that Yeosang wants to kiss off. "You still haven't answered my question, Starlight."

" _ Fuck _ , okay." The brunette huffs in annoyance, cheeks burning hot. "You always make me feel good, Hwa, I always think about you, only you; touching me, kissing me," he ruts into the grip around his cock and moans airily. "I just want you to fuck me, Hwa. Fuck me hard and good, really make me cry for it." 

Seonghwa's response is an entertained sound and Yeosang can't help but think that Seonghwa finds his begging funny. 

"Come on Hwa, I'm serious." He sounds whiny now but swallows his pride, knows that if he whines cutely enough that Seonghwa is granted to give him what he wants. "Can you do that for me, please?" 

The last thing Yeosang expects for Seonghwa to do is let him go (which is exactly what Seonghwa does) as he pouts his lips in thought, running his large hands against whatever skin he can reach. 

“You know I can’t resist when you ask so sweetly,” Another kiss as he sucks against the brunette’s lower lip. “Come on, strip yourself for me.”

Yeosang wishes he knew the world record for  _ the fastest anyone has ever gotten undressed _ because he was pretty sure he just beat it, but he throws that thought away when he returns his gaze to Seonghwa, who he remembers is fully dressed and now watching with hooded eyes as Yeosang sits back and opens his legs, lighting the brunette’s skin on fire as nerves lick at his insides.

This, by far, is  _ not _ the first time they had seen each other naked; their new favorite hobby was taking showers together and Seonghwa had stroked Yeosang off more times than the brunette would like to admit -- but this felt different; not in a bad way, where he was uncomfortable, or like he was forced to or that he is embarrassed by it, but more so it excited him -- it was new and Seonghwa was staring at him like he was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

“You’re the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.” Yeosang almost laughs at the timing. “Every time I think I know your beauty you surprise me.” The raven crawls forward on all fours and touches whatever he can get his hands on; Yeosang’s thighs, his stomach, his ribs, his chest, causing the brunette to tremble in anticipation. 

“You’re just saying that because I’m naked.” Seonghwa raises an eyebrow at the playful tone. “You gotta kiss me and prep me if you’re telling the truth.” This earned him a laugh, loud and bright from Seonghwa and Yeosang swears he tastes clementine. 

“If that’s the  _ only way _ to convince you, then I guess I have no choice.”

That’s how Yeosang finds himself in his current situation: mouth open on a stuttering moan as Seonghwa pumps three slick fingers into him at a quick pace that brushes his prostate every time. 

“Hwa, Seonghwa, fuck,” Yeosang has played with himself before, more than used to the feeling of his fingers inside of him, but that was the thing: he was used to his own fingers. Seonghwa’s hands were larger and his fingers were thicker and Yeosang was sure that if the raven didn’t stop soon he would be cumming all over his stomach in embarrassment. “I think I’m ready, come on.” 

“Are you sure?” Is the ravens response as he crooks his fingers and accidentally pressing directly onto the bundle of nerves that have Yeosang kicking his leg outward on a yell.

_ Don’t cum.  _ He breathes harshly through his nose in an attempt to calm himself as Seonghwa jolts from the reaction, cheeks reddening as he pulls his fingers out. 

“Are you okay?

“I’m fine, almost came all over myself, but I’m okay.” He hears how breathy his voice sounds and bites his lip, looking up at Seonghwa with half lidded eyes and effectively causing the raven to hold his breath. Legs slide apart in an open invitation, fingers tracing his hole teasingly as Yeosang whines, “Can you fuck me now, please?”

If Yeosang thought he got undressed quickly, Seonghwa’s clothes practically evaporated as he shuffled to slot himself in between Yeosang’s legs and suddenly, the brunette is nervous.

Seonghwa is…  _ bigger _ than he remembers, especially when his cock is laid next to Yeosang’s and shows just how far it’ll reach inside him, somewhat solidifying the fact that this was actually going to happen and this wasn’t just a dream or a situation where Seonghwa stroked them off together.

“Jesus Christ,” Yeosang exhales, staring openly. “You were just blessed, weren’t you.” This makes Seonghwa laugh again and the sound soothes the nerves in Yeosang’s chest as he watches the raven reach for the lube again. 

“You flatter me.” Is his response, mirroring Yeosang’s earlier sentiments as he squirts lube into his hand and warms it up. “You’re very chatty, Starlight. Are you nervous?” Yeosang doesn’t answer right away, decides to watch Seonghwa slick up his cock instead. “I need you to answer me, my stars. I’ll stop if you want me to.”

“No, no, I’m good.” Yeosang steels himself, not going to back down when he is  _ so close _ to finally getting what he wants. “Get in me, big guy. I’m ready.” Seonghwa laughs out a humored  _ big guy _ and lines himself up with Yeosang’s entrance, thick head pressed against him and causing the brunette to shiver.

With a shaky hand Yeosang reaches out and holds onto Seonghwa’s clean one that is placed on his hip, lacing their fingers together as the raven presses forward and  _ oh _ , Yeosang underestimated how this would feel (but he isn’t complaining).

“What the  _ fuck _ Seonghwa, holy shit,” The brunette squirms instinctively, just having the tip in him and letting out a huff. “You’re huge.”

“And you’re  _ tight _ .” Seonghwa bites his lip and Yeosang reddens, squeezing at his hand at the sight of Seonghwa’s fangs as the raven continues to press forward.

He doesn’t know how long it takes, but when Seonghwa is finally seated fully inside of him and breathing against his neck, Yeosang is almost vibrating with excitement, trying his best to adjust to Seonghwa’s girth. He can tell Seonghwa is restraining himself by the way his hand squeezes at Yeosang’s almost painfully, the other keeping Yeosang’s thigh pressed against his chest. 

“You can move.” Is the only confirmation Seonghwa needs before he is pulling out again, only to slap back in experimentally and causing Yeosang to yelp in surprise at the sudden sensation, the squelch of the abundant lube filling Yeosang’s ears.

“You feel amazing, Starlight.” The words are mumbled between sloppy kisses that are more tongue than lip but Yeosang isn’t complaining, not when Seonghwa settles on a pace that has his toes curling. “You’re taking me so well.”

_ I was made for you _ is what Yeosang  _ wants _ to say, but instead a garbled mess of words escape his mouth in the least eloquent way possible. 

“You were right, y’know.” Continues the raven as he moves the hand gripping Yeosang’s thigh down to his waist as he sits up, rutting slowly to stave off his orgasm. 

“About?” The brunette doesn’t particularly  _ care _ about what Seonghwa is rambling about, the thick cock in his ass being a pretty effective distraction, but he asks anyway.

“You really do look smaller with my cock in your ass, Starlight.”

Yeosang wants to choke.

(Maybe he does, he doesn’t know).

Instead of answering Yeosang pouts, asking for a kiss that Seonghwa more than willingly gives him as he picks up the pace again, swallowing the moans that slip past Yeosang’s lips. Seonghwa pulls away briefly, kisses Yeosang’s cheeks, his eyes, his sweaty temple, lips trailing down before they reach the slightly discolored markings against Yeosang’s neck, kissing mindlessly at the skin. The brunette preens, skin still as sensitive as the day he was bitten, and before he could catch himself he hears himself talking.

“Bite me, Seonghwa.” Everything stops for a moment; the labored breathing, the roll of Seonghwa’s hips, their heaving chests. It’s painfully quiet and Yeosang feels like he made a mistake, like  _ maybe _ that was something Seonghwa hates, but then the raven is lifting himself to be eye to eye with the younger and his eyes are  _ hungry, _ watching Yeosang like a predator and the brunette can feel his cock twitch in interest.

“It will hurt.” Is the response, hips resuming their pace as Seonghwa reaches up to palm at Yeosang’s chest. 

“I don’t care,” Yeosang whines when a thumb brushes over his hardening nipple. “I want you to bite me, I want those marks to be yours, Hwa, no one elses.” The raven lets out an exasperated sound, sliding his lips onto Yeosang’s in a searing kiss. 

“I don’t want to do something you’re going to regret.” Despite the situation they were in, Yeosang suddenly feels full of love, adoration for Seonghwa flooding him.

“If it’s you, I won’t regret a thing.” Long fingers trail the markings against Yeosang’s skin gently as they kiss, the exchange delicate and contrasting against the sharp thrusts Seonghwa fucks him with.

“My precious little Starlight,” Seonghwa breathes out against his lips prettily and causing Yeosang to burn with love. “I’ll do whatever you want me to do.”

“Then mark me.” Yeosang is panting now, nerves burning as he angles his head to expose his neck, showing off the two patches of skin that never really healed correctly. “It’s okay, I want you to, I have always wanted you to.”

“My Starlight,” A squeeze of his hand and another kiss has Yeosang’s head spinning, the look of absolute lust still splayed across Seonghwa’s features despite his gentle demeanor. “I adore you, to the moon and back.” Lips trail lower, kissing along the way as fire is left in their wake. 

Yeosang only manages to wheeze out a pathetic  _ I love you, too _ before Seonghwa opens his mouth and bites down  _ hard _ , sinking his fangs into Yeosang’s neck and replacing his previous markings.

The brunette thanks the heavens that they don’t have any neighbors because he screams bloody murder, squeezing Seonghwa’s hand as the raven angles just right and hits against his prostate. 

To say it hurt was an understatement; to say it was terrible and didn’t feel good was an overstatement. 

Yeosang was simply existing in this moment; getting fucked within an inch of his life while Seonghwa kept his fangs in his neck as if he was stuck and he quite frankly doesn’t know how he is still conscious, drool sliding down his chin as his eyes roll back from the dual pain and pleasure wracking his body.

He doesn’t know, maybe he  _ does _ pass out, because when he comes to he is suddenly numb, body hot to the touch as warmth radiates from his neck from where Seonghwa is still biting him, flooding his body with numbingly hot pleasure that has his cock leaking miserably between their sweaty bodies. 

“Hwa,” He slurs, free hand scratching at the ravens back. “Hwa, gonna cum, feels good.” The raven growls in response, gripping possessively at Yeosang’s thigh as he forces his legs apart even more and fucking the brunette deeper, harder, ravenously. 

Yeosang is so dizzy when he cums (untouched) that he is positive that he sees stars burst behind his eyelids, feels the waves crash into him with warmth that overwhelms him, drowning him in oversensitivity as he yells out a fragmented version of Seonghwa’s name. He cums and cums, feeling it spurt against his chest and stomach in hot ropes that surely taint Seonghwa’s skin as well, the man in question fucking him through his orgasm without pause, finally having let go of the brunettes neck and watching him with possessive eyes that have Yeosang trembling. 

“-- mine.” Yeosang is spent and exhausted when Seonghwa speaks, not fully catching the statement but not caring enough to ask him to reiterate. His neck  _ aches _ , thrumming with a strange mix of pleasure and pain that has Yeosang drooling.

Oversensitive, Yeosang squirms pathetically, whining in his throat at the constant stimulation that wracks his body but not wanting to separate from Seonghwa at the same time.

“I’m close,” Yeosang hears Seonghwa breathe out and nods encouragingly.

“Cum inside of me, wanna be filled with your cum.” Urges the brunette, rolling his hips weakly against the raven.

Seonghwa cums when he kisses Yeosang, lips melding together in a searing kiss that leaves Yeosang breathless, cum painting his walls as Seonghwa rides out his orgasm inside of him, free hand gripping bruisingly at the brunette’s thigh. 

“You’re mine, Starlight, only mine.” He rasps against the brunettes lips, still rutting shallowly inside of Yeosang to make sure he milks every last drop inside just like Yeosang asked. 

“I’m yours.” Yeosang wheezes out, overstimulated and full, lower back already aching dully from the constant abuse. 

When Seonghwa finally pulls out Yeosang whines, missing the contact already despite the ache, moving to immediately cuddle against the older when he flops down beside him. 

It’s quiet for a long while, Seonghwa wrapping Yeosang into his arms with a series of kisses that leave Yeosang smiley and giddy, clementine and sugar dancing across his taste buds with every kiss.

After a moment, when Seonghwa stops kissing him and they calm their breathing, Yeosang decides to break the silence.

“I really love you, Seonghwa.” He’s looking at the older despite the shyness of his tone, amber meeting silver in the shade of the room. “I love you a lot. I’m happy I had sex with you, even if you almost broke my ass.” That really has Seonghwa laughing, hands running down Yeosang’s arms and back up, squeezing at his shoulder before trailing up to touch delicately at the bite mark that heals quickly at Yeosang’s neck, a new marking.

Theirs.

“I love you too, Starlight.” A kiss to Yeosang’s lips. “Sorry if I was a little rough with you.” Hands find one another in the dark again, lacing together knowingly.

“Don’t apologize, it was fuckin’ hot.” The brunette laughs when Seonghwa pinches at his chest with an exasperated  _ language, Yeosang! _ “It’s true, though. You bit me and like yeah it hurt at first but you managed to make that feel  _ amazing _ and God I am so lucky to have you.” Another kiss and the two of them are laughing against each others lips, eyes sparkling with mirth and Yeosang really feels it then; the love in his chest that doesn’t seem to stop, flooding him and it isn’t drowning, it’s refreshing.

Having Seonghwa like this with him, laughing with him and smiling beautifully: it just felt  _ right _ .

Yeosang smiles brightly, heart thrumming once, twice, three times in his chest before it calms down again, filling his cheeks with pure blush as Seonghwa smiles just as beautifully at him.

“I’m so lucky to have you as well, my moon.” and with the way Seonghwa’s eyes soften, Yeosang doesn’t deny the validity of that statement.

With the sudden courage in his heart Yeosang lies atop of Seonghwa as he touches the ravens neck teasingly.

“How’s about I mark you next time?” He wiggles his eyebrows for emphasis.

Seonghwa’s resulting laugh has Yeosang tasting saccharine sweetness, colors bursting behind his rib cage and splattering them with color.

Yeosang kisses Seonghwa deeply, chasing that flavor until he can pin it.

Seonghwa tastes of love.

Yeosang’s heart thuds once more. 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much if you got to this point!! It means a lot to me! I love Seongsang so much and funny enough I wrote the last one right before Wonderland and now this one before whatever they will throw at us (Answer?? I am withering away). I hope for 2020 I can write more for you all! Again, I hope you enjoyed! Comments and Kudos are very appreciated! ^q^  
> Happy New Year! May 2020 be good for us all! ^q^


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